Abuse: Home Sweet Home.What makes you ignore it in the present?

Worry is the confetti of the ego.

How to let life happen and deal with it as it comes. When we do not deal with our concerns they turn into worry and anxiety. Worry is the confetti of the ego, so let it blow away. If you do not deal with what is sitting under the worry. Your imagination will be stirred by your ego, saying it shouldn't have to deal with reality. Ego will tell you to ignore what's going on or make it someone else's responsibility. Procrastination and not acting to protect yourself can lead to dire consequences for you. There will always be an outage for the worry, whether that is not feeling well, taking it out on another person, or even depression and a full life not lived. You might not tell anyone as a child because of shame as well. You fear you will be blamed. You were brainwashed into thinking this at home sweet home.

When you are a scared child, your imagination takes over because trauma launches you into trying to pretend that certain things are not going on. As a child, you may not be able to escape your bad experiences, so you go somewhere in your head to escape, a place of going blank, shutting off, and imagining you are somewhere else, or the abuser loves you. (They do not). Yes, as a child, you trick yourself into not dealing with the problem. You switch off. Having violence committed against you is physically painful at the least. The shock is painful and could have a huge impact on your socializing and relationship skills. As in, you do not think you are worth looking after.

As we grow in years, we need to step away from this coping mechanism and deal with the reality of what's happening. The false world we created to dive into (to escape) does not serve a purpose anymore.

Trauma hides in you. Let it out!

As I stated in one of my films, you are highly likely to end up in an abusive relationship as an adult if you experience high levels of childhood abuse. You can find this research on The Government Website.

A very friend told me this,  "In my childhood, at one point, I was going to be removed by social services from my family due to my nervous state. A social worker and psychologist asked me what I wanted to do and as I have a friend who had been fostered, I decided that better the devil you know. She had been through the mill. I was then told, whilst under strangulation at home, that I had let the family down. The punishment that was dealt out to me as a teenager by my siblings for telling the truth to a concerned school psychologist was never-ending. My father apologized two weeks before he died, whilst meeting me for coffee. Telling me how proud he was of me, begging me for my forgiveness. He sat and he cried in front of me in a garden centre cafe. I hugged him. I forgave him there and then. He made his peace, and I respect him for that."

She has informed the police about what happened in her childhood and would call the authorities if any of the abusers appeared in her life. Having burning hot food poured over you, fresh from the pot, as a teenager ends any love or respect that ever existed for a sister. That is abuse.

The truth is the truth, and many famous people have come out and talked about their truths including the amazing Lewis Howes, the best-selling author of The School of Greatness, and a lifestyle entrepreneur

So please remember:

1. You are not your childhood.
2. You are not what happened to you
3. And you most certainly need to move on, heal, and make the best of this opportunity called life.
4. Turn the abuse into a present, and make it a positive outcome  They gave you a horrible gift, and guess what, you turned it into gold! Learning, and dealing with the present, reality is the only way forward.
5. And a big hug from me to you, you can do this!!

 S. Vukomanovic. Lawrence 12/02/2024  ©

Myla's blog is worth a visit: https://medium.com/tales-from-the-narc-side